Piece of

Crying cake crumbles from catasrophic negligence

Tears tearing taunted chinawear teatering on island's edge to shattered fate on tile

Fork scrapes fine scruffs forming scaly granite

Uneven plateau rocks raging remnants to insanity

"Why skip time to eat before rot, pompous promt-not?"
                                                  was the cry

La Illaha Illa Allah

It was the most intense moment of weakness
And I just barely asked for strength
I only wanted a pinch of guidance
But not enough to deter me from my intended path
I wanted to attain an ultimate state of success
A short-lived meaningless success

Deep down, I wanted to be removed
I wanted to be flushed clean
But the temptation was so deep
And the echoes died by the time they reached my mind

I stood by the door, hearing footsteps
The army has arrived
The subtle u-turn starting as a curve
My mind became numb
Listening to my limbs
To God's will taking over
I walked over to the bookshelf of wisdom
My hand, without purpose, reason, drive, or logic reached
And beheld a book, "Purification of the Heart"
Deciding to open it, magically the topic was precisely what I needed
But did not want
Stop Read Keep Reading Don't Stop Keep Reading
If-I-put-it-down-I-may-lose
I will lose if I end this

God stopped me
He stopped me
He guided me, away from calamity
Without me uttering a word asking for it
He just did

Verily,
God will guide whomsoever He wills

The Greatest Love

Butterflies flutter in someone else's pit
I witness the explosions but am not invloved
I am engulfed but untouched
I can stand here for hours, feeling the longing, feeling the burn
    None of it is mine

It is the projection of an inimitable love
On the mind that lacks it
It is the echo of a fairy tale made real
     Made instant

I stand but float
I float but soar
I am torn
      Empathy or mine?

Time tells me,
It was only my mind playing tricks on my heart
I do not love
But I witnessed one of the greatest loves of our time

Nobody knows about it.
If you know about it,
that makes you a nobody.

Highku

High hopes lie low till
          Sudden opening is slight
Spring into action

Theighsed

They told me it would matter how well I did
They said if you fail by standards, you fail in essence
They claimed that to be important, you must not deter from designed paths
and to create your own meant self-destruction
They announced all this under the banner of 'individuality'
but I knew it would only last until being true was no longer a fad
Now I await when this very fad climaxes
and reaching serenity through truth becomes our collective goal
Although when vogue declares the new trend
all will end
and flares will send glaring stares upon the unrelenting

Defining freedom negates it
Dont tell me nudity is freedom
Dont tell me that I am free when im no longer chased by men because I give them what they want without their asking
Dont lie to those who come after me, who have not enough time to think this through
before you bombard them with your images of what should and shouldnt be

Because what I seak is tolerance
I seak understanding of what I wear this for
I need for you to know
That I am fully aware of what I am doing
That I do not follow the whims of fallible humanity
but that I am guided by the greatest force of all
and that He wants what is best for me
So dont tell me I am failing at freedom
Dont tell me that I must conform to be accepted
Dont tell me lies, because my truth sees right through them

Poemtry

Truth

I thought I knew you. And more importantly, and what devastated me, was that I thought I knew myself.
Thank you for unveiling the disconnect between my image of myself, and its reality.

rise n fall

splish splash
fake lash
more cash
brown hash
dine n dash
whiplash
face smash
heart crash
fire's ash

Harmless

Aggression is a sign of insecurity.

But why do people build walls? To protect from an offence? Isn't it offensive to build a wall?

As if physical strength or verbal attacks indicate a sound mind and content soul. Well they don't.

It is actually more difficult to be kind and let your guard down. It's very hard to let your self-consciousness show.

My respect for those who exude their inner twitches and their social fidgeting is at a grand scale.

I love those who love to love. And I admire those who are not afraid to show it.

Broke Man

A broke man once told his story. He said, "I asked a payment of $1000 from every adult who had never made a mistake. Somehow I ended up owing money."

Unforgottended

Lost. 

Unfounded. 

Weirded.

Disconnected from an unmeshed world. 

Where am I?

Give me a reason to help

She poured coke into the glass which belonged to no one, then into my friend's whose reaction was silence, and then into mine, which I then thanked her for. What is the difference between pouring into a glass of which no one will claim and into one which the owner is as silent as foam? Where is the gratitude? The appreciation?

Each action has a reaction.

Therefore, in order for you to do 'good' you must have someone to recognize, appreciate, thank you for, etc. your action. The waitress who poured the coke was getting paid, that was her 'recognition.' But what about volunteer work? What about the people who fight for what they think is 'right' when they either get shunned or ignored? Well those very same people may even find a group of rebels or what have you to support their ideals. But what about those who do good when no one is around, when the reaction to their action is either far-fetched, impossible, or invisible. Or self-fulfilling.

Reactions fuel actions.

If you filled a tank of gas with gas, but the car refused to run, would you try overflowing the tank with gas to see if the car would start? No. You would look for the problem elsewhere, and if you cannot find the problem, a reaction to your many actions, or a solution to your observed problems, you would say the car is finished. Therefore, without reactions, actions would seize to exist. Without some sort of payment, good actions would halt.

Let's change the string of logic, since every action does not lead to a reaction. For every ward there is a reward. But who will give it? Why continue with good without believing in receiving a higher reward? If there were no belief in a higher power, then many people who do good for that seemingly mystical reason would simply stop. I know I would.

The world is full of self-centered deceiving jerks, and if you consider yourself an adult, you will have come across at least one of these people in your short or long life. Don't allow yourself to sulk in pity of self or others and to drill yourself a spot in that room of losers. Be the one who knocks on that door to call people to leave it.

Don't do good for anyone who does not have the means to reward you. And the only one who can reward you is some sort of infinite power which inevitably drives us all. Call that force what you will. Most people call it:

God.

The only One worth doing anything for. And He has the power/means/justice/mercy to reward you with more than you ever deserve. Forgive those who wrong you because of your good actions, and adjust your intention to please only the Almighty.

Sole

Apply yourself, but do not exhaust, but do not hide, but do not prance, nor strut, but embrace the waves as they come to take you away, should they choose to raise the tide.

Rapex

Breathe fountains of lush, gushing surges of movement, leaving scrapes of rouge, reaching apex of mind.

Shovel.

This is it.

The moment when everything changes.
For me.

This is when composition and physicality mate to produce an offspring called masterpiece.

I have placed this mode on hold till told idea's not sold. Bold strokes, smooth grooves, sharp cuts into infinite canvas.

I am prepared for guiding genius.

I will commence brilliance.

Finally I have direction, purpose, drive, arriving in time for the grand finale.

Reverse roads unfold smoldering holdings of gold.

Dig.

Pleads

Do not project your insecurity on those who you believe to be your mirror.

Do not blame them for your own faults.

Do not analyze their actions based on the disappointments you have in yourself.

Do not allow your own incompetence to erode relationships because of lack of encouragement and profuse jealousy.

Privelege

I was on North Avenue walking back to my car carrying a bag of a 12-dollar fast food meal from Epic Burger and I saw a peach woman talking on her phone in her Audi with one hand on her Louis Vuitton.

Stated observations lack purpose without implied meaning.

What I want

I don't want to go back to better days. I want to find good days in the future. 

Are Fire

Don't cry my dear, because when fire gives up, its own tears put it out.

This

I looked up to smile at him. He didn't even shift. He had a beautiful face, and a piercing in his upper ear lobe. I wondered what circumstances forced him. I wanted to write a story about him, one that would explore all the intricacies of the overlooked, the invisibles. It was a moment of cliche at its apex. But that doesn't delegitimize my perception. There is a reason why similar stories or phrases are constantly repeated. They have unshakable and constant meaning and presence.

He left at some point and I didn't even notice. I was too busy jotting down my ideas which sound like a voice-over in a film based on a true story, or maybe a boring novel. I sit using this connection to the whole world, when I wonder how connected to the world he is, or whichever world he wishes to be a part of. I have the lower hand in that my fingers type at the height of the keyboard on the desk, while his hands push the top of the broom to sweep the dirt we left behind.

Rue Teen

I arrived home at 12:16 am. It was a long day at school. I worked on my model, drawings, and the event we are planning that feels more and more imminent. It was exhausting. I parked my car to the right of my dad's old Cadillac on our driveway, my typical spot. Once I pulled in, I lost control of my body. In a matter of possibly 5 seconds my hands managed to put the stick in park, unbuckle my seatbelt, remove the keys from the ignition, throw my phone in my bag, grab that day's garbage, put my bag over my shoulder, slide my jacket through the space between the straps and my shoulder, and unlock the door. I only reached consiousness when I  placed one foot on the concrete. I froze for a moment. I am a robot. A programmed robot.
This is how I move everyday. Sometimes I force myself to slow down. To just stop everything and sit. And stare. To feel how it feels to have an empty head. An idle mind. It's refreshing.

thawt

dear reader, eye-user, mind-tapper,


i guess i am supposed to tell you how i feel about my days? 


i can describe my days as being perfect. that even in difficult days i feel content. there is so much to love.
to take. to feel. to think. to _____. infinity. 


it is so unbearably ungrateful to wake up disappointed. its not about being happy to be alive, its that you have the privilege of viewing this message on the internet on a computer or hand-held device or something insane as such. 


people do good for many reasons. and some people do good to get recognized by others. but what happened to recognizing the good in you that was given to you from birth?
why all the personal arrogance?
look in the mirror. that in itself is a feat. to look means to see, which means you have eyes that allow you to realize the world in which you live. check one off the list. next, look at your features. beautiful, in every way, and different, in so many ways, in ways that don't appeal to you. but it matters and is perfect. 
you are perfect. 

utter

the tears of absence knock. i refuse to open. i locked the door and melted the key.
vocal cords remind me of a lost love.
sad songs rejuvinate sorrow.
'you destroyed my soul'
as if love is the only thing we need to live for.
as if without it, we cannot survive.
as if it is a part of the human fabric.

the night listens. but cannot respond.
the day witnesses. but cannot protect.
the evening is confused. and is useless.

the pain of a locked love is melodic.
the charm of happiness cannot compete.

there is only one eternal that we can turn to.

God is greatest.

Today, Only

All faces are grey.


No one has fluorescence. The gloom of autumn is overshadowing my sun. It is not sadness. It is not confusion. It is disconnect. I am separate from the rest, but not different.


I do not wish for another, and I wish for less. Death attempts to impose its memory on me when my lids close. And it succeeds through the rest of my day.


The clouds are doing their job. They are raining on this parade.


Why does it seem all involved in my life are all ill-contented?


Why the sudden lapse in happiness?


Where has the gratitude for God gone?


It has gone with the sun.


Leave gloom, clouds, doom when shrouds loom. If the sun wont show its shy face, then tungsten it is.

As We Know It

You love familiarity. Even after a long day of adventure, where do you end up? 


Home. 


The reason why that word even exists is not because they needed another word for 'house,' whoever 'they' are. It emerged as a result of an action, an action described as 'returning.' Returning is different from arriving, it implies having been in a place and then going there again. So then how do we describe a place to which we continually return throughout our lives?


It is a concept, not a word, a jumble of letters describing a very human need, an instinct. We must belong. We cannot simply exist. That is never enough.


A lion has his pride, what do you have? A family, a career, a purpose? If you zoom out a little, you may begin to question why here? Why them? What now? 
But what do we gain from recognizing something so bland? Why ask so many mundane questions?


Because without understanding our basic humanity, the requirement of man to have a Creator, to believe and worship Him, we can never understanding anything beyond that simple complexity. 


Home is heaven. Every step we take needs to be towards returning. Towards pleasing the One who gave us this earthly home, and Who promised us a return to our original. 

Will

Things aren’t always as they seem. And the world is never how we want it to be. We may believe in a very strong truth. We may believe in something so much that we believe it is our destiny. But the only value in that is to channel that faith in to believing in God’s plan. He has a plan for us greater than any plan that any of us could come up with. He knows where our end will be, as well as our beginning and our journey to that end. How are we to arrive there if we only trust in our own vision and feelings? If you can even begin to believe in God, then you surely have the capacity to believe that He will guide your life through a path that will have the greatest possible ending.

Witness in Court

No struggle is unwritten, or unforseen. Whatever results from your endeavors is destined. No matter what steps you take or words you say, it was and is known. Those steps and words are required for your destiny to be fullfilled. So look at life this way: you are playing an already-scripted life, and that all you do was already designed.

So how do you explain the fact that your actions are driven by spontaneous or well thought-out choices, and that the results correlate directly with those actions? How can it be destiny if you could have chosen to let go of the one you loved, or fight for them? How is it written that you will end up, or not, with that person had you not chosen to push?

It is far easier to say that unforseen events are destiny, and that the results of our actions are separate from that, and that fate does not guide our decisions.

But that is precisely where we have miscalculated. Consider yourself an unforseen event. Every decision you make is an event in itself. You cannot control others, so their actions are 'destined.' Therefore your actions are perceived in the same way by the others. Simply because YOU are the cause of something happening does not exclude you from the greater picture. You are a part of destiny, and hence every thing you do or think or say or believe was documented, and will happen no matter what.

You are executing the grand plan with every little move you make, although no move is so little. You cannot understand the effect of one ripple on the ocean, because you cannot see the entirety of the ocean with your two eyes. So trust the One Who can see everything, at once, in space and in time.

All you have to worry about is that in whatever fashion you reach your destiny, that you arrive with dignity and having been the best slave to God that you could possibly have been. That is in your control.

You can control your character. You can be devoted to God in all that comes your way, whether it is an outside event or something resulting from your actions.

Make your journey speak for you, not against you