I arrived home at 12:16 am. It was a long day at school. I worked on my model, drawings, and the event we are planning that feels more and more imminent. It was exhausting. I parked my car to the right of my dad's old Cadillac on our driveway, my typical spot. Once I pulled in, I lost control of my body. In a matter of possibly 5 seconds my hands managed to put the stick in park, unbuckle my seatbelt, remove the keys from the ignition, throw my phone in my bag, grab that day's garbage, put my bag over my shoulder, slide my jacket through the space between the straps and my shoulder, and unlock the door. I only reached consiousness when I placed one foot on the concrete. I froze for a moment. I am a robot. A programmed robot.
This is how I move everyday. Sometimes I force myself to slow down. To just stop everything and sit. And stare. To feel how it feels to have an empty head. An idle mind. It's refreshing.
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